Africanese 101

    Hope the new year's being good to you. So, I've been in the US for about 5 months now... I think this happens to everyone when they're somewhere foreign to them, that they'll find some oddities in the behaviour of the people they're around (and it's so annoying that the word 'behaviour' is underlined). Anyway,besides the point. So, naturally, I am a bit of a spectacle to some of the Americans I meet. I've noticed most of them are people with little to no filter, and the questions they ask and comments they make, which are seemingly harmless, have the potential of grating nerves when asked and/or said frequently enough.
    First off, I'm pretty sure when you ask someone where they're from and they answer Europe (but who does that, surely?), naturally your follow-up question would be "Where in Europe?". Interestingly (and by that I mean not at all), when I say I'm from Kenya, the only thing that sticks is that I'm African, and as such any future follow-up questions will be focused on how things are done or the state of affairs in Africa. I tend to think these people are of 'the country of Africa' mentality variety. It's irritating, it really is.
    Here's another thing I could live without hearing: "I'm from Kenya." "Oh, you're from Africa? I've always wanted to go there." "Where in Africa?" "I dunno, I've just always wanted to go there." This is an actual conversation I had. Bypassing the fact that my mentioning where exactly I'm from had no bearing whatsoever, it begs the question, will you jump on a plane and land somewhere off the coast of northern Africa and simply wander? There are 53, yes, FIFTY THREE countries in the continent of Africa; we have more countries than there are American states. Pick one already.

Area: 30.22 million sq km (America covers 9.857 million) 

    Sometimes I wish I could take some of the people I know on a trip to Kenya so that they see the non-existence of the rock they think I've been living under. Scenario: in the spirit of throwbacks, I was feeling a little Linkin Park and was playing Encore. Someone asks the question (brace yourselves): "You guys know Jay Z in Kenya?" WHAT?! Really? I still get looks of surprise when I sing along to a popular song or sing some old ones. We know them. We know them all. We listen to songs as they come out. All. Of. Them. This is up there with "I don't know how you do it in Africa, but here we...". In no scenario is that leading statement necessary. If it's not gonna kill anyone, just do it.
    Now, this may be hard to believe, but we don't all live in a perpetual oven. It rains. It gets cold. It even snows in some parts of Africa (gasp). You know how California and Alaska don't have the same weather? That makes sense to you, right? Then why on earth would you think the whole of Africa has blistering heat 24/7/365? The whole of Kenya doesn't have the same climate. Africa has deserts, rain-forests, highlands, and all the other good stuff you can find out about. How, you ask? Well, there's this amazing creation I like to call G o o g l e.
    My point, and I do have one: I don't expect an American to know all there is to know about Africa, heck, even I don't know it all, but there's a distinct difference between a lack of knowledge and ignorance, especially when it seems like someone doesn't mind sounding ignorant because it's Africa. I highly doubt that any African would mind answering questions about their home (who doesn't like talking about their culture?), but, it would be nice if an outsider bothered to learn a thing or two about basic trivia. Impressive even. Believe me, you'd be such a novelty, and a welcome one at that.
    I recommend watching African American by Trevor Noah, a South African comedian, available on Netflix. As usual, he puts a...fascinating spin on things.
    Enough about that. Plans for Valentine's weekend: go to the theaters and watch Fifty Shades of Grey as I judge every second of it, alongside my fellow single girlfriends. Keep an eye out for a follow-up post. This should be interesting...

Laters