End of Year Shebang

    I'm so horribly inconsistent, I know. I'd apologize, but that would be implying that I'll change :). So, 2015, huh? I'm kind of sad that 2014 is over, but I can honestly say I've gotten all I could get from a single year, and then some. I'm really thankful to God for the peaks this year has brought for my family and in my personal life. Since I'm all deep and stuff, the days leading up a new year always has me reflecting on how the past 365 days have impacted me, highlights, low points, the works. So...
    In 2014 I learnt that wishing for something with all your might for something won't make it happen. I had issues with my weight and actually got off my ass and did something about it, and it felt bloody amazing. It was one of the most gratifying things I had done for myself in a while, and I was proud of myself for doing it for me.
    In 2014 it was reaffirmed to me that every single thing happens for a reason. God makes no mistakes. All that you go through has a purpose to serve in your life. It may not always be clear why, but I've learnt to trust in His perfect will to be done and everything will fall into place. It's a long story, but a disastrous Chemistry finals practical in high school set the ball rolling for me to be studying in one of the best research universities in the US. I kid you not.
    In 2014 I learnt that sources of indescribable joy comes in small packages. I am yet to meet the new addition to our family, but I love him so so much already, and even a thousand miles away, I can tell that that tiny human being has shone a bright light in a household where shadows had been cast.
    In 2014 I learnt that I'm a pretty perfect version of myself. When I was starting to figure out who I am, I realized that I'm very introverted, I'm perfectly fine with spending hours on my own, I'm uncomfortable in large social gatherings, I detest small talk, I'm empathetic to just about everything, I'm fairly good at reading people, I'm extremely private (still can't believe how much I share on this blog) and I'm emotional. I used to think that no one naturally has that much of an affinity for solitude. Then I discovered I'm an INFJ, a very rare personality type, making up less than 1% of the world's population. This is how I'm built, and I'm unapologetically me.
    In 2014 I learnt that nothing is set in stone. For the longest time ever I've been telling anyone who'd listen that it is my life-long dream of becoming a doctor. Medicine was it for me; ask me what my second choice would be, I would look at you with utmost confidence and declare,"There are no other choices." In high school, I'd had a passing thought that if it wasn't for my undying adoration for medicine, engineering would be an option, maybe (I was one of those kids who loved physics). I never really gave it much thought, though. Welp folks, I got to college and fell in love. With biomedical engineering.

    In 2014 I learnt that American slang is stupid, Americans speak shockingly bad English for people whose only language is English, and they curse unnecessarily frequently. I am in a land where "I can't even" is a complete sentence, anything difficult is "disgusting", the word "like" is, like, used, like, instead of, like, pauses, like, in, like, sentences, people constantly "literally die" and make you wish you were dead, and if you don't like something you're "not into that life" (face-palming for days). Also, the crazies dwell in Walmart.

    In 2014 I learnt that a large number of people sadly think that it's wrong to hold an opinion different from theirs, to be different from them, and are incapable of viewing things from someone else's perspective, and I'm so thankful I'm more open-minded than that, and because of that I've met really great people who aren't Catholic, straight, dark-skinned, African. Don't hate what you don't understand. There's far too much to learn.

     On January 1st I declared 2014 to be my year, and it turned out better than my wildest dreams. To 2015 I say, surprise me (but please be nice); I'm ready.

    "Hope smiles from the threshold of the year to come, whispering, "It will be happier.""

                -Alfred Tennyson 

   Wishing you an amazing New Year.

#MyDressMyChoice

    I honestly can't remember the last time I got this riled up over anything. So,last week I was scrolling down my Facebook homepage, and randomly saw this post about a woman who had been stripped in the middle of town, by touts no less, because, according to them, she was indecently dressed, clad in a miniskirt. My initial thoughts were, "*sigh* Not again." And I moved on. Later on, I see various females posting their status with the hashtag #MyDressMyChoice. That got me curious, so I decided to watch the video for myself. What I saw still gives me chills. The utter savagery and barbarism I witnessed was something I'd never thought anyone capable of. They were pawing at her, and I mean that in every sense of the word. It was like watching NatGeo Wild, except likening them to the graceful, fierce wild animals would be an immense insult to the animals. So I watched in morbid horror as they crowded her and tore her clothes from her body and laughed and yelled and had an absolute ball, as the woman screamed and pleaded to be left alone, in vain.
    A couple of emotions were running through my mind as I sat frozen in place after watching that, first being that if I were back home I'd be scared shitless to even step out of the house, because, really, who's to say someone won't simply up and decide my jeans are too tight, or my blouse is too low cut, and proceed to rid me of them? Secondly, that one simply can't not feel outraged on behalf of that poor woman. Another one was disappointment that in this day and age, Neanderthals still live among us.
    You'd think that the madness would end there. I mean, after seeing the video, I'd assumed most, if not all, people would be just as, or more, outraged than I was. Wait til I take to Twitter and see Robert Alai's (why is he known again???) tweets, something along the lines of those "men" (please) being justified in what they did and that it was the right course of action, followed by replies of other "men" applauding him for saying so. At this point I'm just staring at the screen with my head tilted, (at this juncture, picture the woman in a purple shirt and the tiny ponytail on top of her head with her hand raised, palm up, with a "wtf?" expression on her face). It took a while for it to sink in that there are people who actually think this was ok.
    Demonstrations were held today protesting this heinous act, and violence against women. Some "men" (I believe the logic behind my use of quotation marks is obvious) were going on about how they should be focusing on important things, and how they should stop advocating for indecent dressing, that "it is not the African way". What truly saddens me is that they just don't get it. Would they really maintain their standpoint if the woman being stripped and publicly humiliated was their mother, aunt, sister, niece, wife, daughter, girlfriend, friend? Sure, they might object and claim that the women in their life do not dress like that, but really, if we are permissive of this kind of behaviour, who will stop the next group of men from deciding to have some fun and strip a random woman naked, then, ever so stupidly, claim, "She was indecent, we were teaching her a lesson"? It's a downward spiral. What scale is being used here to judge the level of decency? Am I, a grown-ass woman, supposed to ask permission to wear my own clothes? Clothes that I bought , with my money? Should we now turn to men for fashion advice? Or maybe all women should begin wearing uniforms?
    Dear men, for those who are still puzzled by the backlash, or think it's an overreaction, or deem it unnecessary, this is the point: there is an enormous difference between the law and moral opinion. Nowhere in any Kenyan law does it dictate what a woman may or may not wear, hence if I so wish to break out my mini skirt, provided I attained it legally, I am still well within my rights to wear it. Sexual harassment, however, is very much illegal, last I checked, which this most definitely was, no ifs, ands or buts about it (so whether or not you support this madness speaks volumes of your character), and should, under no circumstances be tolerated, at all. It is also within your rights to judge, criticize, shake your head, point and laugh, and generally show your distaste for my choice of wardrobe, but that is where your right to react ends. So, feel free to reminisce of the days of old, and whatever it is you think happened, but you'd do well to remember, my life, my money, my dress, MY CHOICE.

How You Doin'?

     I'm supposed to be studying for a midterm I have in 3 days, but hey, I'd rather be doing this. So, on the 22nd of last month, we - and by we I mean me and the wonderfully hilarious voices in my head - commemorated the 20th anniversary of the greatest show television has ever, or will ever, produce. Yes, people, F.R.I.E.N.D.S! So, as my way of celebrating the awesomeness that is this iconic show, here's a rundown of WHY WE LOVE FRIENDS!!!!! (cue applause)         

     I'm just gonna do it BuzzFeed-ish style, because, honestly, I could write a ballad about this thing. Heads up, I may be just a wee bit fanatical about it, but there are worse things to obsess about. Oh, and this is gonna be a long post (with a few references only devoted fans such as myself will get), but likely the most interesting thing you read this year, so sit tight, maybe get a snack?

Chandler Bing

             

    I cannot begin to express the love I feel for this character! Although this happens practically with all of them, 90% of the things that come out of Chandler's mouth will most likely leave you tilting your head sideways, eyebrow raised, thinking,"Whaaa???" (what you kids like to call WTF moments). The sarcastic word vomit is his most prized trait, I would say. It's like, "I know I don't have to be sarcastic, but the world has given me so much material to work with, and I'm just not one to be wasteful." (By the way, he's given me so much material to work with, I don't know what gifs to pick; he's just so flingin'-flangin' funny!)

         


           

Sometimes he takes things too lightly...

            #Word

Let's not forget, the moves like CHANDLER






Give it up for the Chan-Chan-Man!


Phoebe Buffay
    My goal mission in life is to find a friend like Pheebs, although BuzzFeed seems to think that I'm most likely to be the Phoebe in my group of friends. Best compliment ever as far as I'm concerned. Alias Regina Phalange, (reasons best known to her), and briefly, Princess Consuela Banana Hammock (you can't make this stuff up), Phoebe's the quirky, eccentric, superstitious one of the group, and that's putting it mildly. Her aloofness just makes her all the more lovable.

She's street, kinky, 'Save the Planet' and brutally honest, all rolled into one blonde bombshell.

          

Oh yeah, and she sings. Her own compositions. Oh, boy...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34172ltXqw8

Since crazy recognize crazy, she ended up marrying this guy...



But basically,

 'Nuff said.


Joey Tribbiani
    Sometimes Ken Adams. I tend to think of him as the slutty, lovable oaf of the group. He's the ultimate ladies' man, and the mastermind behind the best ever pick-up line, that works like a charm every time,

          

                                          Barney Stinson ain't got nothing on him

Now, Tribbianis may not be great thinkers or world leaders, they may not read a lot or run very fast, but damn it, they can eat! Oh, and one thing you probably wanna remember...

There's only one thing he likes as much as food...

He also kind of scares easy...

It doesn't usually go well when he tries to sound smart. He tries, he really does...

 

He's sweet and goofy and I love him!

Ross Geller

    Ah, the Divorce-Force extraordinaire. Even Joey doesn't understand how he got three women to marry him. He sure knows how to pick 'em...

He's the nerdy guy with a weird dinosaur obsession.

         

He's ordinarily a sweet guy, til, you know, he sleeps with the xerox girl, but hey,

         

What else...well, basically, he's all about dinosaurs and divorces. That is, when he's not doing seriously weird stuff to his body...

And screwing up the English language...

What's not to love!

Monica Geller
    OCD poster-child right there.

Phoebe: Because, I'm just, I'm incredibly anal and an unbelievable control freak.

Monica: No, you're not.

Phoebe: I know I'm not, but you are, and I was trying to spare your feelings.

 She's the 'mom'/drill sergeant of the group; the insanely competitive, responsible, voice-of-reason type, whose idea of fun is ironing wrapping paper and cleaning the oven.



A little bit of a wet blanket, but she has her raunchy moments...

And her moments of pure insanity...



And, she's capable of being funny too!



Admittedly, she really is the glue that holds the group together.

Rachel Green
    I feel like I watched her grow up. She went from ditzy, spoilt and pampered to, well, ditzy, responsible and employed. And promptly learned, the struggle is real.



She is not a morning person...




Were they on a break?



 She has such a way with words



At least she and Ross make a good parenting team...





Mainly, they are so adored because they have the kind of friendship and love everyone wants. So even though they don't really have other friends,



they're always there for each other.
    Kinda sucks to not have new episodes anymore, but this is the one show I can watch over and over again and laugh just as hard every time. For those who haven't watched FRIENDS (because you live under a rock...?), fret not, all 10 seasons of it will be on Netflix in January!

   Well, this was fun!

    

Journey to the Free World

    I have been planning on this post since two weeks ago. Bear with me, I feel like I've been immersed in a whirlwind. So, yeah... I'm here! Where to start...
    The flight was smooth enough. Honestly I thought I'd be insanely terrified; I am acrophobic after all. The entire Achieng clan, and then some, took me to the airport. I'm pleased, and a little surprised,  to report that there were no tears! I was absolutely geared up to cry my little heart out. Anyway, I actually enjoyed flying. Sat next to a pleasant American headed to Maine, who was nice enough to bear with a clueless first-time traveler. Food was good, entertainment was on-point, crew was friendly... BA's got it right in my book. I definitely would've enjoyed it more if I didn't have such big-ass suitcases to haul around though, as predicted. So after 27 insanely long hours, 4 of which were spent sleeping, I landed in New York.

First glimpse of the US as seen at a crazy high altitude

    Of course, my journey would be incomplete if it didn't include weird encounters. The most memorable one was when I was checking in in Chicago. Some dude with a really long weird looking beard notices my beaded bracelet of the Kenyan flag and asks, "Are you from Africa?" So, first thought, he can recognize the beads, but not the country he saw them in. I just smiled and nodded, clarifying that I am indeed from Kenya. He goes on to inform me that he's been to Nairobi, where the villagers made him similar beads. Ok, this is me operating on four hours of sleep and already feeling the effects of crossing so many time zones, hence, forgive me for not thinking of a comeback, I let it slide. The other not-so-crazy one was with the customs officer who asked me where I'd learnt English because apparently it was pretty good. For a second I actually thought that might be a trick question. Almost asked even. But I guessed that he'd probably had prior experience with not-so-good English speakers.
    I'll admit I'm one of those people who had the notion that they'd find out of this world things in the US, like it's in a realm of its own. Well, if you're like me and you're reading this, prepare to have your bubble burst. It's all very normal; it's different, but the same, if that makes sense. Basically everything we have, but better. About the school... love it! It really is beautiful. People are friendly (for the most part), the food's not that bad (doesn't make up for chapati; nothing ever will!), and professors try their darndest to be funny. I'll admit it was...odd, and a little daunting, knowing that I'm now part of the minority, more so because I'm the only black person in our hall, but I forget that pretty quickly since no one really makes it a point to bring it to your attention.

I'm not alone...flags of countries represented at U of R

    Listen to this: I have an accent! Me! Not only that, they can't understand it. I mean, I don't pronounce the rrr like they do (you know, dancrrr, prrrfect...you get the picture) and I enunciate my t's. Oh, and my speech doesn't entirely consist of the word 'like'. That's about the extent of my so-called "accent". Oh, well. Needless to say, I repeat myself a lot.
    I think that's everything I have to report for now. Oh, I've lost 4 pounds since I got here! Take that, Freshman 15! Feeling a tad nostalgic already. Definitely miss the food, speaking Kiswahili whenever I want, even the psychotic matatus...oh, and sharing certain jokes with people (the number of times my math professor says the word fundamentals...I just can't). Gotta go. Ugh, I do homework now. And don't get me started on having to carry backpacks around again...

MAB out;)

Pretty Hurts

 Hey guys. As of this moment, I'm a size 12! You have no idea how immensely proud I am of myself. That said, sometimes I find myself having to be reminded of what I've accomplished. I'm 20 years old, but even at my age, jabs at my weight still strike a nerve. I could list a good number of reasons that strengthened my conviction to shed some pounds. One of them, and a strong one, is visitors or relatives always feeling the need to question when I decline some manner of food, or serve small portions, and someone offhandedly states that I must be trying to lose weight and/or am on a diet. To which I give a small smile, bow my head and promptly block out the conversation.

    Now, this doesn't seem like that big a deal, and there's probably no malice behind their saying so, but it tends to get under your skin after the umpteenth time you hear it. Since my weight loss journey, comments of this nature were blissfully absent and were replaced with observations of how baggy my clothes are, to my absolute delight. So imagine my utter deflation when at a seminar of sorts yesterday, it came up twice. Twice. First because I don't take sugar with my coffee. Then when I didn't take afternoon tea. I mean, how about, I'm just not a fan of tea! Honestly if someone were relating this to me, I'd have thought it was a joke. File it under #BigGirlProblems.

    My mood pretty much took a nosedive from there. I was angry at myself that I let their comments bug me as much as they did, and that because of it I began downplaying the progress I've made. I hit an all-time low when I actually zipped up my jacket. Lord knows I was beyond relieved when the day was over. My general mood was in the dumper. That is, up until this morning when I came across a Facebook post from 'Humans of New York' that had the photo of a plus size woman striking a pose in her underwear sporting a huge smile, the caption a tribute to different people who in some point in her life took a jab at her weight. She went on to say how OK she was with her stretch marks, which she's had since puberty. Of course, the comments that followed ranged from "You're beautiful!" to "You're a pig" (I kid you not).

    After reading this, I just smiled and decided to get over myself. It was one of those moments when you feel like you were meant to read something, and it genuinely speaks to you. I don't quite know how to best put what it felt like in words, only that I realized it was high time I reevaluated my self-perception and fell back in love with myself. This is why Beyonce's Pretty Hurts resonates so strongly with me. And with that, I leave you with these emphatic lyrics.

Pretty hurts

Shine the light on whatever's worse

Perfection is the disease of a nation

Pretty hurts

Shine the light on whatever's worst

Tryna fix something but you can't fix what you can't see

It's the soul that needs the surgery

Are you happy with yourself? 

Lovely week y'all :)

The Big Chop

    My head feels so much lighter now! No stress; I can dance in the rain, and have hurricane winds blow over my head without a care in the world. I'm not saying this stuff's on my bucket list, but I like having options :)

    Don't be fooled; a few months ago if you'd have proposed such a, then, 'preposterous' idea, I'd have most likely given you a healthy smack upside the head. It was honestly one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make. Only a woman would understand my hesitation. So, after weeks of changing my mind, then changing it back, I finally hauled my behind to the salon and sat stock-still as I watched my hair being shaved off.

    I couldn't tell you how momentous that 'occasion' was to me. I am the epitome of routine. Typically I'm not one to take risks whose outcome I can't predict, or control for that matter, especially when it comes to my hair. Yet there I was, sitting in a salon I'd never been in, trusting a guy I'd just met not to make me look like a crazy person, because honestly, at that point I was just praying the lights wouldn't go off or he wouldn't sneeze and make me bald or something.

    After getting my hair cut, I decided to kick it up another notch and get it dyed red. Don't get too excited, it's very subtle, but hey. Baby steps. I think I'll go a bit wilder next time. Look at me being all daring! All in all I'm really glad I'm back to natural. It's like being handed a blank canvas. Ah, the possibilities...

Loser Alert

    You should've seen me on Thursday coming out of the doctor's office, smiling like a goon. Why, you ask? I've lost 4kg bitches! (Sorry, I've recently learned the merits of cursing when excited). Heed my words, I may bitch and whine about the annoying laps I run, and the agonising mountain climbers & pushups (in my head, of course) but they're all worth it! I'm practically giddy with ill-concealed glee :) I'm not likely to prance around in a bikini anytime soon, or in this lifetime for that matter. Frankly, I can live with that. Comfortably. Hey, I was destined for curves *wiggles eyebrows,naughty wink*.
    Now I have 4 weeks of boot camp left. Can't say I'm all teared up about leaving soon. I'm almost on my goal weight so I'm positive I'll walk away from it with no regrets, and in all honesty I'm really proud of myself for having taken this step; it's been one of the best decisions I've made all year.
    Thanks for reading :-*

UR Insane

    I'm having one of those days when I'm not very sure of how I'm feeling or what I want to do with myself, but I want it to be something fun. I guess this is one of those times when the phrase ' je ne sais quoi ' applies. But to be perfectly honest, I've been in a state of perpetual excitement for a while, especially now that school is drawing near. I literally find myself spontaniously bursting into random dance. Of course if you lived at my house, you'd probably be like, ' What else is new'. But really, I almost did pirouettes yesterday! ( HAHAHA. Yeah right. I did have a little bit of a 'Chandelier' moment though).
  It's so typically me. Whenever I'm psyched up for something that's still a while away I start planning for it earlier than is probably necessary. Honestly if left to my own devices I'd most likely do my clothes shopping (which I had originally scheduled for, silly me, the end of July), get me some big-ass suitcases and pack. Today. I kid you not. Heck, I'm already formulating in my head what I'll wear for travel! ( I'm looking forward to this trip, in case you didn't catch that).
    In a way, though, it'll be a bit of a reprieve from all the planning once the time finally comes, cuz newsflash honey, nothing about this has been cheap. Yikes! From enrolment deposits, visa fees, medical tests, air tickets, not to mention the amount of shopping involved... Let's just say the one who'll be the most relieved to have this whole process done with will be dear ol' dad.
    I'm still waiting for the absolute terror to rear it's ugly head. It'll come eventually, I'm well aware, but till then I shall ride this euphoric high for all I'm worth!

Cheat Day

   Hey! So, I went for the Cake Festival yesterday... Stuffed my face with cake, as expected, and best believe I got my money's worth.
    Did you know that all there is to a cake festival is eating cake? *Shocking, right?* For real though, I thought there would be so much more to the day. But it wasn't all that bad; I caught up with some high school friends, and of course, the endless supply of cake samples didn't hurt one bit.
    All in all, I had my day of disregard for what I shoved in my mouth. I had so much sugar in my system I could've crapped gummy bears, pardon my french. It's safe to say I've sated my cake craving for a good long time. So now I'm back on track, baby! I have a little over a month left so I'll try to make the most of it & kick it up a notch. Trust me, the only reason I've been able to stick to my regimen is cos it's paying off. Let's see what July will bring, shall we?

    Happy new month! ♡♥

Continued...

    Took a two week hiatus because the flu got me down. The break almost had me falling off the wagon, except for the fact that I am now a very proud owner of a very loose-fitting pair of pants. Not only that, I can truly say I'm happier than I was when I started. I may not be where I want to be, but I'm definitely making headway. I went shopping with my mum on Friday then I held up a top and asked her what she thought. She turns to me and asks, "Won't that be too big on you?" The amount of joy that was bubbling up in me... In my head I was screaming, "I LOOK SMALLER THAN MY ACTUAL SIZE!" You gotta count the small victories.
    Last week I read some random tweet along the lines of "I hate it when chics try to lose weight when they don't need to". This observation was, no doubt, made by a guy. I resented that, but at the same time, couldn't fault him for thinking that way. More often than not, we don't exactly have the best of reasons for deciding to lose weight. Still, the fact that that 'chic' made a decision to lose the weight is enough cause to applaud her. It takes a lot to take that first step. Ultimately, what we need is a pat on the back and words of encouragement once in awhile; don't rain on our parade!
    In other news, I've been thinking of how I only have 10 weeks to reach my goal weight, then it hit me; I have only 10 weeks before I fly out to school! Yes, turn green with envy *evil laugh*. Anyway, I shan't bore you with specifics, but yeah... Life's good. At least I'm preoccupied so I don't have to succumb to watching football (I can't, I just can't). Until next time, loves.

Happy Father's Day! 

.......

    Hey! So, 10 sessions of boot camp later, and the trainer swears I've lost weight. I didn't believe him at first, but then there's these two dresses... One is a maxi dress that I tried on last month. It's one of those dresses with an elastic bodice, and when I wore it then, it felt like a vice. That was probably my moment of truth. The other one is this fun A-line dress that I wore to a Christmas concert last year, and it had never felt so snug. So, anyway, they fit ok now! Absolutely awesome feeling :)
    Soon most of my clothes won't fit, hopefully, but then who's complaining? Any excuse to shop. I'm hoping for major progress by the end of June, when I'll be going on a shopping spree with my very stylish friend Karre (catch her & her pal Lizzy on their fashion blog, Two fashion dorks). Also, that's when I've scheduled my cheating day, at the Cake Festival! You know how if you're gonna cheat, do it with someone hot? Yeah. (But seriously, don't cheat.)

    That's it for now! A luta continua.